A Caminhante

“O que prevalece agora é essa maneira nova de sentir a vida. Essa perspectiva que me faz admirar, incansáveis vezes, antigas preciosidades. (…) O que prevalece agora é essa apreciação mais desperta, que me permite reinaugurar flores e céus e pessoas no meu olhar. Essa graça que encontro, de graça, nos detalhes mais singelos. (…) Os problemas, os desafios, as limitações, não deixaram de existir. De ixaram apenas de ocupar o espaço todo.” Ana Jácomo (Jornalista e Escritora Brasileira) #internagrowth #ashtangayoga #anajacomo #sirsasana

She is the air breeze that fill the lungs… Her heart beats at the sound of the drums, Played by men as they endeavor to get themselves ready For a new day that it is still yet to come. We are our mother’s daughter and son. Gaea is her name. Our faith is linked to her will and our blood is the same. This sky is our roof, the rivers our bed sheets. And while we reconnect to the ground, we are sure not to be defeated. Where is she? Where is she? The child-bearer of the humanity? She is there where we are. She is here where we stand. And beneath the shining stars, Brothers will build the promised land.

I’ve learned how to pay attention to nature and to enjoy myself among the trees. The city chaos is overwhelming sometimes and I’m always searching for a little vegetation where I can sit for a while. I miss my hometown. Within a week there’ll be this traditional fair that takes place every year at the same place. I won’t be there. I miss it too. I remember when I was younger and was always complaining. I’d be constantly writing at my diary how sad and miserable I was. I wanted everything right away, I wanted people to notice me. I wanted to be the brightest. I wanted to feel pretty. I wanted to be part of the pack. But then you grow up and realize that what was supposed to bring you happiness (because society says so) didn’t necessarily make you happy. You may have the things but you’ve not learnt how to value them. People may see you but only for the wrong reasons. You may be smart but that’s not a guarantee of finding a good job. You may be an ugly soul trapped inside ...

I’ve always had those “another step” moments while doing my yoga practice. These are specific moments. I know that every day is different, but some differences click inside. I do not always fully understand what has actually happened. It may be the understanding of the posture but sometimes it is something more emotionally related. These last two weeks I’ve been questioning everything, really every…thing. I look like one of those rebels without a cause as I’m not even sure what I am rebelling against. And off course I’ve been questioning my own practice. I know there are things that need to change but I’m not ready to face the consequences. We all need to face our demons especially when we’ve been running away from them for too long. My demons are there when I practice, are there in my mind, are there goofing around and saying “you’re not good enough, you’ll never be good enough.” I know that yoga is not about what you see with your eyes but what you realize with your soul. ...

We are born free but eventually we'll all become part of a "flock", trapped in ideas and beliefs. It may come to mind the wish of becoming free again. It is our rebel moments. I've discovered recently that most of the times we're just choosing a different flock, a different leader, a different belief. We want to spread our wings but we're still a sheep. And I'm sorry to inform you but sheep don't fly.

I can’t help but think there’s something tremendously wrong with me. It can’t be my face nor my body. I mean there’re not perfect but I’ve seen worse. It might be my inner side. Sometimes I think I’m a crap, a piece of nothing important and I guess everybody sees it though I’m still wondering about it. I feel like I don’t fit in, constantly at the wrong place with the wrong people. Those who said once they liked me, have already left. Probably that means they didn’t like me that much. And I’m afraid of letting someone new into my life. I’ve held myself to vain words that actually meant nothing. I played the role of part-time choice for others and accepted being always on second place. I hate myself for that, especially for those times I said “it’s ok” when it wasn’t ok. And then there comes a moment when you really need a helping hand and you are alone … with your thoughts, which by the way are the worst companion. I’m on my mid-thirties and I feel like I need to do some...

Days go by. We pray God for rain and pray God for hope. Human being is expected to move forward no matter what. The past is the experience that hopefully will make us do better in the future. This world has turned into a scary place, though. Still there is beauty in a tree, a flower, a sunset, a wave. Mother earth can comfort us but as a mother she will also ground us until we learn. There’s one thing I heard a few years ago and never forgot. Nature does not forgive. Nevertheless, it allows us to redeem ourselves.